In my own head

Today I made coffee in the office and then realized that we had no milk. People sometimes seem curious about my internal dialogue, so here's a bit. All of what follows was actually spoken out loud to myself.

(Looking in English Department refrigerator) Hmmm, no milk, there's some salad dressing. It looks a bit like milk but probably not a good idea. 

(Science refrigerator) At the old building they sometimes had dead animals in the freezer. This fridge is too small for that. Okay, there's cream cheese, dairy, but too thick. There's somebody else's Starbucks coffee with some milk in it. Would that work? Don't know, but there must be a better option.

I did eventually find someone with leftover half and half minis.