I went to an Ear Nose and Throat doctor today. I always wondered what a doctor would do if they only wanted to do ear and throat and no nose. Anyway, I have a problem in my throat so I went to this guy today.
It was a little disconcerting because they said I'd been there 6 years ago and I have absolutely no memory of it, even after he told me what I was there for. This time he was looking for what was causing my persistent cough. I'd already seen a fascinating video of my swallowing radioactive pudding and Lorna Doones, and that didn't show any problem with my swallowing. So we're following the tubes to see where the problem is.
I always figured it was ear nose and throat in that order because it's alphabetized, but even here, when I'd not mentioned any problems with anything but the cough, the doc first checked my ears, then my nose, and finally my throat. He checked my throat in 3 ways.
First was the standard stick your tongue out and say ahh. Then he takes a paper towel, has me stick out my tongue again, only this time he grabs it, pulls and tells me to talk and then to sing "Eee, eee, eee." Try to say that with your tongue stuck out. I made a bit of noise and then started coughing enough that I saw stars. Then, and here's the fun part, he pulls a long thin tube out of the drawer and I know I'm in trouble. Really the only question is what he's going to stick it into.
I always figured it was ear nose and throat in that order because it's alphabetized, but even here, when I'd not mentioned any problems with anything but the cough, the doc first checked my ears, then my nose, and finally my throat. He checked my throat in 3 ways.
First was the standard stick your tongue out and say ahh. Then he takes a paper towel, has me stick out my tongue again, only this time he grabs it, pulls and tells me to talk and then to sing "Eee, eee, eee." Try to say that with your tongue stuck out. I made a bit of noise and then started coughing enough that I saw stars. Then, and here's the fun part, he pulls a long thin tube out of the drawer and I know I'm in trouble. Really the only question is what he's going to stick it into.
He asks me if I have one nostril that's easier to breathe through so now I know. He gives me a bunch of tissues in case my eyes water, tells me it'll feel like I have a mosquito up my nose and then sends what feels like a fairly large number of mosquitoes up my nose. He then makes me talk, sing, and sing in a falsetto. I do an terrific job of pitch matching, because I am an excellent singer, especially without a tube up my nose, but he says nothing.
After all that he says my voice box is irritated, but he's not sure why, so we get to start testing medications, plus I'm not allowed to eat for 3 hours before I go to bed. That's going to be hard.
So nothing's settled, but it was certainly an interesting experience.
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