Travel Day

I know that people write lots of stuff about airports, but for someone who is easily amused they provide oodles of entertainment. I’m traveling solo today, a rarity now but extremely common back in the day, and I’m glad, because I rushed around enough to totally muddle my brain and allow me to do pretty much everything wrong on my way in.

First, I didn’t check the gate, so I parked at the absolute worst terminal. I could have moved, but I’ve heard so many horror stories about security lines that I decided not to. I had to go from Terminal B to Terminal F, which are about 2 letters apart. I thought I’d just walk my bags over there, but as soon as I went through security I was reminded that I’d brought a bottle of wine as a “come with” gift, and you can’t bring that through security because…well, because I don’t know, but you can’t. So the security agent led me back out through security (the line is much shorter in that direction, by the way) and suggested I check my bag downstairs while comforting me by telling me that what I did wasn’t nearly as stupid as the guy who had a $500 handgun in his bag and had it confiscated a few days ago.

I checked my bag and went through security again, got some coffee and decided to walk to terminal F, but the sign on the walkway said I’d have to clear security again when I got to terminal F, and I really didn’t want to take my shoes off again, so I took the shuttle bus. It’s a huge bus, plenty big enough for me and the other woman and the driver, and almost, but not quite, too big to maneuver around the airport. When you take the shuttle bus you get a close-up view of the workings of an airport. We passed what looked like a huge dome tent that had a complicated-looking bag belt. I imagined my poor bag trying to navigate it. Then we passed a large locked bin with a sign that said Satellite Accumulation Area, and I was not able to conjure up any idea of what might have been accumulated inside it. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t satellites, though.

Finally at Terminal F, I find a place to plug in my laptop (hint: think like a cleaning person), but find that it’s $7.99 for Internet access. Awful. So this is being post-posted.

Arrived safe and sound in Greenville-Spartanburg, SC, where they have free Internet access.