I'd actually started this before that guy died letting his Tesla drive him so he could watch Harry Potter (I hope at least it was for the first time). But this kind of stuff had been in the news before because of the discussion came up about what a self-driving car should do when the choice is hitting pedestrians or another car versus hitting something that could kill you, the driver.
Honestly, this seems like the kind of thing one ought to be able to choose with a pulldown menu, or maybe a 1 to 10 scale like in surveys. And depending on your choices, your insurance company could make the requisite choices in your coverage- more medical coverage if you choose your own hard, more liability if you're going to hit someone else. I'm sure the actuaries can come up with something.
Reading this made me think of an experience I had a few years ago. I was driving on a road with the lovely name of Balligomingo. It's a narrow, winding road along a hillside. Much of it is either unpopulated or has office and light industrial parks on the non-hill side of it. In one spot though, there are a few houses.
People park their cars in front of the houses, right along the side of the road, like up to the line separating the road from the mostly nonexistent shoulder. One day I was driving through at around the speed limit and someone came out of the house with a little kid. The kid started to run around the car and then saw me and stopped. And as I passed, a car also passed in the other direction.
So nothing happened. But what if the kid had actually come running out? I've seen kids do that. I had a kid come flying out of a side street on a bicycle without looking, maybe 50 feet in front of me. I'm always looking for side street mischief, so I was able to slow down in time, but it didn't have to be that way.
So what do I do if the kid comes running out into my lane as the car passes in the other direction? I can keep going and just run through the kid, which kills them and probably leaves me unharmed. I can steer to the left and hit the oncoming car and possibly the kid as well while leaving me anywhere from bruised to dead. Or finally, I can steer right and hit the parked car, probably hitting both the kid and the mom as well, but possibly not killing anyone.
I don't pretend to have an answer to what I should do there. All I'm saying is that no matter what your coding skills, it would be hard to write an algorithm to sort that out.
Thursday, June 30, 2016
First full week of summer
Been a busy summer so far. I've done two webinars, which is exactly 2 more webinars than one should ever have to endure. It's like a seminar except without the human contact. In other words, nothing like a seminar. But it sounds cute, except it doesn't.
I'm also engaged in 2 long and deep correspondences with auto-replies. This is kind of fun. You can say whatever you want and you still get the same polite reply. It's kind of like shrieking at automated phone attendants, like Julie from Amtrak.
Had a few things go through my mind as well. First, I saw some little kids, maybe 3 or 4 years old, out playing on their lawn and giggling nonstop. There are also a few 8-10 year-old girls and slightly older boys who play on their lawns or ride in the streets around the neighborhood. Without a parent hovering over them. Yeah, actual playing.
It struck me how rare it is to see or hear about this kind of thing these days. When I was a kid, and in this case I mean ages 7-14, when I lived on a residential street in Brooklyn, you would get home from school and start knocking on doors to see who could come out to play. During the summer you would pretty much just wake up and do the same thing.
You knew who to ask and when. The Irish family across the street were churchgoers, so you never asked on Sunday until after lunch. The Orthodox kid could only play on Sundays and occasional summer weekdays. Most of the others were looser. Some of them would invite you in. Some were busy. But you could usually round up 4-8 kids to play some kind of game, which would be decided by the group. If there were only 2 or 3 of you there different things we could do.
And except for the occasion bit of participation by my friend's uncle Carmine, who loved to play touch football, there was never an adult to be seen. We knew we could go a block away to what we called the schoolyard, which was actually the faculty parking lot for Midwood High School, or stay somewhere on the block. And we'd keep it up until there was a critical mass of people called in for dinner.
Occasionally kids would come from a block away or from around the corner, but usually it was just the bunch of us on East 24th Street between Farragut and Glenwood Roads.
I'm not saying all this for nostalgia's sake. It's just nice to see even a glimmer of hope that the "keep the children safe" meme that's central to the ongoing Global War on Fun isn't the be all and end all. We live in the safest time to be alive in human history, in one of the safest countries. But we've all been bamboozled by stories of snatched children and the dangers of this and that and the like, which I guess happens sometimes here and there in a country of 350 million people, but which is HUGE news when it does happen. So parents are paranoid. It's just dumb and it's bad for kids.
There's more, but I'll pick up the rest in the next post.
I'm also engaged in 2 long and deep correspondences with auto-replies. This is kind of fun. You can say whatever you want and you still get the same polite reply. It's kind of like shrieking at automated phone attendants, like Julie from Amtrak.
Had a few things go through my mind as well. First, I saw some little kids, maybe 3 or 4 years old, out playing on their lawn and giggling nonstop. There are also a few 8-10 year-old girls and slightly older boys who play on their lawns or ride in the streets around the neighborhood. Without a parent hovering over them. Yeah, actual playing.
It struck me how rare it is to see or hear about this kind of thing these days. When I was a kid, and in this case I mean ages 7-14, when I lived on a residential street in Brooklyn, you would get home from school and start knocking on doors to see who could come out to play. During the summer you would pretty much just wake up and do the same thing.
You knew who to ask and when. The Irish family across the street were churchgoers, so you never asked on Sunday until after lunch. The Orthodox kid could only play on Sundays and occasional summer weekdays. Most of the others were looser. Some of them would invite you in. Some were busy. But you could usually round up 4-8 kids to play some kind of game, which would be decided by the group. If there were only 2 or 3 of you there different things we could do.
And except for the occasion bit of participation by my friend's uncle Carmine, who loved to play touch football, there was never an adult to be seen. We knew we could go a block away to what we called the schoolyard, which was actually the faculty parking lot for Midwood High School, or stay somewhere on the block. And we'd keep it up until there was a critical mass of people called in for dinner.
Occasionally kids would come from a block away or from around the corner, but usually it was just the bunch of us on East 24th Street between Farragut and Glenwood Roads.
I'm not saying all this for nostalgia's sake. It's just nice to see even a glimmer of hope that the "keep the children safe" meme that's central to the ongoing Global War on Fun isn't the be all and end all. We live in the safest time to be alive in human history, in one of the safest countries. But we've all been bamboozled by stories of snatched children and the dangers of this and that and the like, which I guess happens sometimes here and there in a country of 350 million people, but which is HUGE news when it does happen. So parents are paranoid. It's just dumb and it's bad for kids.
There's more, but I'll pick up the rest in the next post.
Sunday, June 26, 2016
After what's next
Following up on the "What's next?" post, there's something that's on the edge of the Maslow hierarchy of needs triangle,
(not to be confused with the Ron Swanson Pyramid of Greatness). I remember when I first read Maslow's book where he introduced this principle (note that I say "first read" to imply that I've read it more than once, which isn't true, at least in the last 40 years) it contained the seemingly made up word, "belongingness." And at its heart, I think that's the most basic need that constant communication tries to serve.
I'm not sure that it does that, but it does tease at it, which is perhaps more addictive than the real thing. I've heard the phrase "like-minded people" used in both positive and negative contexts, and Internet (actually, I think OED just eliminated the capitalization for that word and don't ask me how I know that because I have no idea) connectedness allows these people to find each other.
So if we're going to search for the next big thing, we should first decide if we're going to move up or down the triangle from belongingness, which is in the middle. It's not an easy choice, because as you move up you are possibly getting people more likely to innovate and embrace new things, but as you move down you encompass more people and more basic needs.
Honestly, I'm not even sure how to approach this. There's not likely to be one specific aspect of a person's life that sparks it. Once you move above the physiological needs, everything gets more complicated. Pick anything, morality, or health, or self-esteem and you can see there's more than one set of indicators and decision points working. It's a system of things, and systems are messy.
The need for belongingness comes from (and notice how definitive I sound here with no basis for being so) from the societal changes that have isolated people from their tribes, for lack of a better term. We're all much more separate now, and our kids even more so. Suburbanization, an overload of organized activities and not enough free play, needless caution to the point of paranoia about what's "safe." All of these (and many more factors) contribute to feelings of isolation.
So maybe we should turn around and approach it another way. Not what's in the hierarchy, but how are people feeling? Talk about a mess, but here's an idea. What's the stock reply you get any time you ask them how they are? It's always "Too busy, but..." Maybe the Next Big Thing springs from the need for relief from the overload in general or from specific symptoms of Too Busyness.
Of course, it's just an idea and it may not be right, and even knowing the underlying motivation isn't enough. You need the "Wouldn't it be great if...?" question completed. Too much for a Sunday afternoon.
(not to be confused with the Ron Swanson Pyramid of Greatness). I remember when I first read Maslow's book where he introduced this principle (note that I say "first read" to imply that I've read it more than once, which isn't true, at least in the last 40 years) it contained the seemingly made up word, "belongingness." And at its heart, I think that's the most basic need that constant communication tries to serve.
I'm not sure that it does that, but it does tease at it, which is perhaps more addictive than the real thing. I've heard the phrase "like-minded people" used in both positive and negative contexts, and Internet (actually, I think OED just eliminated the capitalization for that word and don't ask me how I know that because I have no idea) connectedness allows these people to find each other.
So if we're going to search for the next big thing, we should first decide if we're going to move up or down the triangle from belongingness, which is in the middle. It's not an easy choice, because as you move up you are possibly getting people more likely to innovate and embrace new things, but as you move down you encompass more people and more basic needs.
Honestly, I'm not even sure how to approach this. There's not likely to be one specific aspect of a person's life that sparks it. Once you move above the physiological needs, everything gets more complicated. Pick anything, morality, or health, or self-esteem and you can see there's more than one set of indicators and decision points working. It's a system of things, and systems are messy.
The need for belongingness comes from (and notice how definitive I sound here with no basis for being so) from the societal changes that have isolated people from their tribes, for lack of a better term. We're all much more separate now, and our kids even more so. Suburbanization, an overload of organized activities and not enough free play, needless caution to the point of paranoia about what's "safe." All of these (and many more factors) contribute to feelings of isolation.
So maybe we should turn around and approach it another way. Not what's in the hierarchy, but how are people feeling? Talk about a mess, but here's an idea. What's the stock reply you get any time you ask them how they are? It's always "Too busy, but..." Maybe the Next Big Thing springs from the need for relief from the overload in general or from specific symptoms of Too Busyness.
Of course, it's just an idea and it may not be right, and even knowing the underlying motivation isn't enough. You need the "Wouldn't it be great if...?" question completed. Too much for a Sunday afternoon.
Saturday, June 25, 2016
Cleaning up
I am cleaning my desk. And it seems to be working so far. Understand, this is by no means done but there's been enough done to refer to it as a work in progress. This may not look like anything special to some of you, but those who know what my desk usually looks like, be sure you're holding on to something.
My first real piece of business this summer is to attend our quarterly family foundation meeting. As I read grant proposals I'm struck by the overwhelming prevalence of policies that may sound smart when presented in a simplistic way, but are actually completely stupid from a societal point of view. Yes, I know this sounds like a thesis statement. Sorry, I work in a school.
One such policy is the existence of laws and regulations forbidding people and often the entire families of people who are convicted of crimes from public housing. I mean, on a completely surface basis I understand- no government aid to people who were manufacturing meth in their apartments. That makes perfect sense and I can't disagree that those people should be permanently barred.
But what makes less sense is, say, a 3 year ban for someone convicted of a misdemeanor. So what is such a person, especially say a 19 year-old, to do? Where can they go if their family lives in public housing? There aren't any good options. The family can move, which is a hardship. Or the person can return and hope they don't get caught, which is highly risky because it could lead to the entire family being evicted. And what else exactly? That's where the surface sensible/bigger picture stupid part becomes evident.
And how about this? In some places, eviction proceedings begin upon arrest. Does that make any sense at all in anything but the most brute force sense? Innocent until proven guilty anyone?
I get it. Housing authorities need to minimize crime in public housing. But can't there be any thoughtfulness about it? Anyway, that's one of the things we're talking about today, whether to fund an agency that works with authorities to be more flexible, especially with youthful offenders. We'll see.
I was also struck that in the 200-odd pages of grant proposals that I read, I only saw one mention of LGBTQ issues. Considering that we're working in a most general sense on issues of societal fairness, you'd think that might come up a bit more often.
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| Now on to the desk drawers |
One such policy is the existence of laws and regulations forbidding people and often the entire families of people who are convicted of crimes from public housing. I mean, on a completely surface basis I understand- no government aid to people who were manufacturing meth in their apartments. That makes perfect sense and I can't disagree that those people should be permanently barred.
But what makes less sense is, say, a 3 year ban for someone convicted of a misdemeanor. So what is such a person, especially say a 19 year-old, to do? Where can they go if their family lives in public housing? There aren't any good options. The family can move, which is a hardship. Or the person can return and hope they don't get caught, which is highly risky because it could lead to the entire family being evicted. And what else exactly? That's where the surface sensible/bigger picture stupid part becomes evident.
And how about this? In some places, eviction proceedings begin upon arrest. Does that make any sense at all in anything but the most brute force sense? Innocent until proven guilty anyone?
I get it. Housing authorities need to minimize crime in public housing. But can't there be any thoughtfulness about it? Anyway, that's one of the things we're talking about today, whether to fund an agency that works with authorities to be more flexible, especially with youthful offenders. We'll see.
I was also struck that in the 200-odd pages of grant proposals that I read, I only saw one mention of LGBTQ issues. Considering that we're working in a most general sense on issues of societal fairness, you'd think that might come up a bit more often.
Thursday, June 23, 2016
Now what?
I rarely completely clear my mind unless I'm trying to. Sometimes I think a big things; sometimes I think about small things. It tends to depend on how much I have going on.when I'm busy, it's the small things. Like, why is Adhesive Tape called that? Aside from videotape, what kind of tape isn't adhesive? Isn't adhesion what tape is for? It's a "where am I and what am I doing?" kind of mindset. But I'm with less busy, I tend to free associate more and other things coming to play. Like what's going to happen next.
"With what?" you may ask. And that's a very fair question to which I do not know the answer. I mean in general, what's the next big thing? Or you can pick any sort of societal trends. I think a lot about cell phones and smart phones. First, because I was in the cell phone business, albeit 20 years ago. But also because we spend an off a lot of time at school talking about cell phone (I personally prefer "mobile," which describes the usage, not a technology nobody understands, but then again, nobody knows what AM or FM mean either) policy. And as adults we talk a lot about what the effect of ubiquitous smart phones is going to be on our children.
I'm always a bit disappointed when people assume that what's going on with kids and mobile devices (can we come up with a better name please?) is bad. I've said this before. We have no way of knowing. It could be the biggest thing since sliced bread, which was itself a slight improvement over unsliced bread.
"With what?" you may ask. And that's a very fair question to which I do not know the answer. I mean in general, what's the next big thing? Or you can pick any sort of societal trends. I think a lot about cell phones and smart phones. First, because I was in the cell phone business, albeit 20 years ago. But also because we spend an off a lot of time at school talking about cell phone (I personally prefer "mobile," which describes the usage, not a technology nobody understands, but then again, nobody knows what AM or FM mean either) policy. And as adults we talk a lot about what the effect of ubiquitous smart phones is going to be on our children.
I'm always a bit disappointed when people assume that what's going on with kids and mobile devices (can we come up with a better name please?) is bad. I've said this before. We have no way of knowing. It could be the biggest thing since sliced bread, which was itself a slight improvement over unsliced bread.
But back the matter of what's going to be the next big thing. Everyone having smart phones is a really big thing, a really big change in the way we conduct ourselves. First there's the ability to contact anyone from almost anywhere. Then there's the computer aspect of it. Computers have only been generally available for about 35 years, so in that time we've gone from there being no such thing as a personal computer, to everyone carrying one around with them all the time. That's crazy, considering how much computers can actually do for you. Revolutionary change of this sort means two things. One, it's really going to change people and the way they behave and the way they interact with each other in the world. Second, it means we have absolutely no idea how. How could we?
So there is the "how is this going to affect us?" question, and there's also the next big thing question. I say this because I don't think people really understand that the personal computing revolution is over. But it is. That's not to say there aren't going to be advancements and improvements, and probably some important ones. But they're going to the evolutionary. The difference between having no computers it all up and having powerful one on your person at every moment was the revolution. Exactly how powerful they are and how big they are is not a revolution. It's evolution.
But the incredibly frustrating and incredibly cool thing about human history is that you can't anticipate this kind of stuff. We don't know what's going to be the next big thing. People spend all their lives and millions of dollars trying to figure it out, but it's never anything more than a educated guess and I don't pretend to have any better idea than anyone else, I just know that it's not going to have anything in particular to do with what's the next tablet or cell phone.
But the incredibly frustrating and incredibly cool thing about human history is that you can't anticipate this kind of stuff. We don't know what's going to be the next big thing. People spend all their lives and millions of dollars trying to figure it out, but it's never anything more than a educated guess and I don't pretend to have any better idea than anyone else, I just know that it's not going to have anything in particular to do with what's the next tablet or cell phone.
And don't talk to me about the so-called Internet of Things, as if it's something revolutionary. I know all about the stuff that's going on, voice activated assistants that connect to appliances and heating and cooling systems and alarms and all that kind of stuff. I have no argument with convenience and usefulness of this kind of business, but convenience and utility do not a revolution make. Yes, it's easier to tell the voice activated assistant to turn the thermostat down 2° but it's not that much easier than walking four steps to the thermostat and turning it down yourself. And if you're away from home, I agree that some sort of remote access is useful, but what sort of revolution has a result of saving a few dollars.
I mean, Amazon Prime is useful and convenient and can save money, and I like it. It's a really good thing. And it's great for Amazon's business. But it's not a revolution. It's just a better form of something that already existed. That's evolutionary. Same thing with self driving cars. They're still cars.
I mean, Amazon Prime is useful and convenient and can save money, and I like it. It's a really good thing. And it's great for Amazon's business. But it's not a revolution. It's just a better form of something that already existed. That's evolutionary. Same thing with self driving cars. They're still cars.
So now that I told you what the next revolution will not be, I suppose you're waiting for me to show you what the next revolution will be. To which I reply "Ha ha ha." How the hell can I know? I'm smart, but I'm just a guy who doesn't really know all that much in the largest scheme of things.
The people who call themselves futurists, and I use that phraseology because I don't think such a thing really exists, think about this kind of stuff is and they look for needs that are unmet. Unfortunately, there's no way to necessarily anticipate with those needs are. I don't think people thought we really needed to be able to communicate with everybody we know at any time and by multiple means. There were reasonably functional ways of communicating already. And yet now many people, especially young people, who are the ones who matter, do need to be in touch with everybody all the time. That took the fortuitously simultaneous development of mobile phone and micro computer.
So what else is like that? If you want to have fun and play with it, I'd suggest starting with fundamental human psychological needs. We've now dealt with the need for connectedness. What's next? Time to read some Maslow and dream a bit.
So what else is like that? If you want to have fun and play with it, I'd suggest starting with fundamental human psychological needs. We've now dealt with the need for connectedness. What's next? Time to read some Maslow and dream a bit.
What happens in-service stays in-service
I'll be honest, I've written more than one post about the vapidity (vapidness?) of in-service days. Not because I care so much, but because people have an abiding curiosity about what teachers do on those mysterious days.
It's not like in-service time is automatically useless, because any moment of consciousness is potentially valuable, whatever you may be doing. But what I'm not sure is whether a lot of the in-service days I've been part of have brought any kind of incremental value beyond what I would have gained from going for a walk or reading the newspaper.
That's hard to measure, obviously, but the fact that I can't remember most of what we've done over the years is a clue. It's probably unfair of me to think about it this way; these days aren't being planned specifically for my benefit, so maybe I shouldn't expect too much out of them. I also need to be careful because people that I like and respect plan and execute these days, but just as they weren't designed for me personally, my antipathy isn't personal either. I've just lived through a lot of days-long programs, here and at other places I worked, that had some kind of idea behind them, but they are almost never successful in accomplishing much of anything.
This is true for a couple of reasons. First is that most people, even really smart, accomplished people, are lousy strategic thinkers. There is nothing innate about thinking strategically; it's not a talent, it's a skill. We are by nature tactical, reacting to small, immediate concerns rather than the larger picture. But to make any large-scale thing work, there needs to be a clear set of objectives and strategies behind it. And I've not been witness to a whole lot of that in my life.
Monday, and to a lesser extent Tuesday, were an better than most but not an exception. We spent most of the morning learning about a new LMS, short for learning management system. That means some sort of integrated gradebook, lesson planner, all round way of fostering communication between teachers and students for the most part, but for everybody in the school community more generally. Clearly it's useful to have one of these things, and I say that as someone who was appalled and amused to know that until not that long ago, we had no idea who was in school and who is not on a daily basis.
The last day we started with the union meeting. This is outside the scope of the in-service, and it's not really something I can or should discuss publicly. So is interesting though. After a short interlude of what they call department work, which for me consist mostly of throwing things in the garbage, we had our final organized activity.
This activity was generated by the fact that our Board of Trustees is going to begin a strategic planning process. What I said above expresses my general opinion on this sort of thing, but it's possible that I'm just irritated that there is a strategic planning process going on that doesn't involve me. That's one of the more annoying symptoms of feeling like one is always the smartest person in the room.
Anyway, in pursuit of the strategic plan, we are moving from from an affirmative topic process rather than a problem-solving approach, and no, I'm not going to explain it. Today we did the first stage, which is referred to as the Discovery stage. I'm not sure that we actually discovered anything, to be honest. In fact many of us professed to be pretty burnt out on this sort of exercise, where we have to sit in groups and talk about what we appreciate about the school and people in it. It has a ring of familiarity to it that's more repetitive than comforting.
Nonetheless, we came up with our list, and as is the drill, brought it back to some common room where we and all the other groups pasted our list on the wall and read off of the highlights to the rest of the group. At this point there's some discussion about what a great community we are and then it ends.
In this particular case, we were asked to remember our group numbers, 1 in my case, which I'm writing here so I'll remember it, so that we can reconvene in the same groups in the fall. That sounds fine with me, I like my group. Anyway, there are more pieces attached to this thing. I think there are seven stages of this or is that something else? Maybe 12 steps? Is that familiar? Maybe four; I don't now. Will be picking it back up in September.
After that, it was back up to the office, where I spent some time throwing away more papers and saying goodbye to a colleague who is off on a new adventure. In the course of cleaning, I uncovered a summary of the statements gathered from an in-service in the fall of 2014. Amazingly enough, it was almost identical to what we had just gone through. And you wonder why I'm sometimes a little bit jaded about this.
I truly believe that all of these exercises are well-meaning. But you know, my road to hell is paved with good intentions too. We'll see how this one turns out.
The last thing I did was offer to be part of a task force on discipline in the school, noted disciplinarian that I am. I'm not sure whether my general lack of structure makes me better or worse for this, but in any event I volunteered to be part of it. My big thing is that I think it's very difficult to follow the rules of conduct in the school when nobody knows what they are. So if I can get that point across and it somehow leads to there being a clear and well-defined code of conduct and and some sense of what the consequences are for violating that code, I'll consider it a success. Otherwise, it's not going to be particularly useful.
I made this known to my colleague who is running the task force. In the course of it, we had a discussion of dress code. This is been talked about in the school for a long time. Administrators always kept boxes with sweat pants and sweatshirts in their offices for people who are not appropriately attired. Clearly fashions of changed in the last 13 years, and the dress code has adapted, or perhaps is not adapted, to the point where it really doesn't exist at this point.
I made this known to my colleague who is running the task force. In the course of it, we had a discussion of dress code. This is been talked about in the school for a long time. Administrators always kept boxes with sweat pants and sweatshirts in their offices for people who are not appropriately attired. Clearly fashions of changed in the last 13 years, and the dress code has adapted, or perhaps is not adapted, to the point where it really doesn't exist at this point.
Part of the problem with having a dress code, is finding someone who is comfortable enforcing it. This was hard enough 10 years ago, but it's pretty much impossible now. Unlike my usual MO of just spouting off, I actually did a little bit of reading about this, and what I gather is that there are no good dress codes, that dress codes are inherently discriminatory against girls and physically mature girls in particular. That doesn't sound like a good start to me.
It'll be interesting to see where that all plays out, but I'm encouraged by the fact that it will play out in some way, instead of just being ignored. Because dress code is one of those things that if we pretend it's there and then don't do anything about it, it's worse than if there was nothing at all.
So on this chord, because it would be oversimplifying to say on this note, we've ended the period of in-service and it is now officially summer vacation for teachers. After my bike ride, I intend to start my summer vacation by taking a practice PSAT and throwing more stuff away, but at home.
Saturday, June 18, 2016
Honoring me
There's a line that I partially remember spoken by someone whose name escapes me (I looked it up- it's Woody Allen from Annie Hall). It's something 90% of life is just showing up. There are many versions of that type of line. Yogi Berra said about baseball that 90% of the game is half mental. Thomas Edison and others had other variants.
I got honored at the school's annual meeting last night for 13 years of service. You could say that 90% of that is just showing up, but considering that I'd never previously stayed at any job for even half that long, there's got to be more than that.
It's always nice to hear people say nice things about you and congratulate you. Over the years I've learned to take a compliment and not deflect it (harder than it sounds) so I can enjoy the moment. I don't like ceremonies or meetings very much though. They always last too long (and no, I'm not suggesting that they should have honored me and then just adjourned), but I did manage to rewrite the curriculum for my precalculus class for next year, so the time was not wasted.
At the end of the meeting, someone said something about the school year being over and time to enjoy the summer. All of the teachers present smirked at each other and thought (or said) "Not if you have to write report cards it's not." So that's what I have to do now- write report cards.
More later. We have in-service next week, which is always fun to report on.
I got honored at the school's annual meeting last night for 13 years of service. You could say that 90% of that is just showing up, but considering that I'd never previously stayed at any job for even half that long, there's got to be more than that.
It's always nice to hear people say nice things about you and congratulate you. Over the years I've learned to take a compliment and not deflect it (harder than it sounds) so I can enjoy the moment. I don't like ceremonies or meetings very much though. They always last too long (and no, I'm not suggesting that they should have honored me and then just adjourned), but I did manage to rewrite the curriculum for my precalculus class for next year, so the time was not wasted.
At the end of the meeting, someone said something about the school year being over and time to enjoy the summer. All of the teachers present smirked at each other and thought (or said) "Not if you have to write report cards it's not." So that's what I have to do now- write report cards.
More later. We have in-service next week, which is always fun to report on.
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
End of the year
I know the school year is a cycle and cycles don't really have ends. Ask Krebs and Calvin. But today was my final exam, which means the end of this academic year and the end of this year's classes. Every summer, there's a moment or two that makes me think of the end of the movie, The Candidate. The movie is very much worth seeing, but I'm guessing none of you ever will (though it's timely at the moment) so I won't worry about spoiling anything (also it came out in 1972 so it's a little late for spoiler alerts).
In the movie, a candidate, played by a very young and charismatic Robert Redford, plays a candidate who is somewhat reluctantly recruited to run against a very popular, seemingly unbeatable incumbent. The idea of campaigning when there's no prospect of winning sounds attractive to Redford's character, and he goes around saying whatever he wants. Well (spoiler alert) a bunch of things happen. And he ends up winning. The last scene shows him trying to talk to his advisor as throngs of reporters and others converge on him. He says, "What do I do now?" but the advisor can't hear him and he mouths the same question, which the movie leaves unanswered.
It's a moment often pops into my mind in times of transition. It fits well with my general orientation, which is that the most important question to ask one's self at any moment is "Where am I and what am I doing?" I know it sounds stupid. It's not stupid though, it's simple. In a good way. It's also extremely helpful and instructive if you're genuine about it. What's the situation? What's my objective? How am I going to try to achieve it?
Once I'm finished grading papers and writing report cards, I'll get on with the summer. I'm traveling a bit this summer, two weeks in England and a week in Lake Placid. I also want to see my friends. When I think about what things upset me at the moment, one of the big ones is how infrequently I see my friends. I really need to do something about that. And maybe I really will this time.
In the movie, a candidate, played by a very young and charismatic Robert Redford, plays a candidate who is somewhat reluctantly recruited to run against a very popular, seemingly unbeatable incumbent. The idea of campaigning when there's no prospect of winning sounds attractive to Redford's character, and he goes around saying whatever he wants. Well (spoiler alert) a bunch of things happen. And he ends up winning. The last scene shows him trying to talk to his advisor as throngs of reporters and others converge on him. He says, "What do I do now?" but the advisor can't hear him and he mouths the same question, which the movie leaves unanswered.
It's a moment often pops into my mind in times of transition. It fits well with my general orientation, which is that the most important question to ask one's self at any moment is "Where am I and what am I doing?" I know it sounds stupid. It's not stupid though, it's simple. In a good way. It's also extremely helpful and instructive if you're genuine about it. What's the situation? What's my objective? How am I going to try to achieve it?
Once I'm finished grading papers and writing report cards, I'll get on with the summer. I'm traveling a bit this summer, two weeks in England and a week in Lake Placid. I also want to see my friends. When I think about what things upset me at the moment, one of the big ones is how infrequently I see my friends. I really need to do something about that. And maybe I really will this time.
Late night in New York
I'm on my way home from New York right now and I'm cranky. Part of it is because my train home was 2 hours late (I switched to one that was only an hour and 10 minutes later), so instead of getting home around midnight I'm getting home at 1.
I'm also cranky because I went to New York for a gala. yes, I know that galas sound like fun and you do get to see some cool people. Yes, that's Joe Torre (who is genuinely warm and personable) between me and my daughter in the Plaza Hotel.
The problem with galas is that you see people you might want to talk to and never get a chance to talk with them, because there's a gala going on. My dad really wanted me to come to this, because he (along with Joe and Angela Lansbury) were being honored. That's fine for him. My dad is a philanthropist and he gives a lot of money to New York area causes, so he gets honored sometimes. It's just frustrating to go to these things and see my whole family and some friends and pretty much do nothing more than stare at them either across the table or at some other table while people are making speeches. The only silence is when you're eating.
Well, if you want to keep up with friends it's all in the follow-through. You can't count on the people who hold galas to do it for you. Keeping up with people is not my forté. Gives me something to work on, I guess.
I'm also cranky because I went to New York for a gala. yes, I know that galas sound like fun and you do get to see some cool people. Yes, that's Joe Torre (who is genuinely warm and personable) between me and my daughter in the Plaza Hotel.
The problem with galas is that you see people you might want to talk to and never get a chance to talk with them, because there's a gala going on. My dad really wanted me to come to this, because he (along with Joe and Angela Lansbury) were being honored. That's fine for him. My dad is a philanthropist and he gives a lot of money to New York area causes, so he gets honored sometimes. It's just frustrating to go to these things and see my whole family and some friends and pretty much do nothing more than stare at them either across the table or at some other table while people are making speeches. The only silence is when you're eating.
Well, if you want to keep up with friends it's all in the follow-through. You can't count on the people who hold galas to do it for you. Keeping up with people is not my forté. Gives me something to work on, I guess.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Making Memories
If I was going to think of my least favorite tones to set in writing, wistful would be right up there with the absolute worst. It's such a strong dislike that I've been having difficulty sticking with the Boys of Summer, which is a seminal baseball book, but whose tone is so wistful that it's hard to get through a page without my skin beginning to crawl off my body.
So in as wistless way possible, let me recount some thoughts and memories.
There's a lot of stuff I'll remember fondly from the strip. Some of them involve the group, like singing Shehechianu (and you can't begin to imagine what autocorrect did to that), and some of them are solitary, like my bike ride up to the top of the suspension bridge and my supine float from the bay back into the cove on a longboard.
I think one of these reasons that these memories feel so precious is that they involve doing something that I never in my life thought I would ever do. If you had told me 15 years ago that I would enjoy going to the beach and staying in a cheap hotel in with 60 teenagers and five other adults, all of whom I like to varying degrees, but none of whom are among my best friends, I have told you were nuts. But I really truly did enjoy myself. I liked being with the kids, even though I was in a semi supervisory role of all time, which is I guess what I always am when I'm with a group of kids.
It all seems paradoxical to me, my job. In many ways, I'm a loner. I don't mean that in the sense that I hate people or strongly prefer being by myself all the time, but I am perfectly comfortable being myself most indefinitely.
At one point, some of the kids were talking about how they weren't sure why they acted differently with different groups of people. This touched on one of the great realizations of my life, as far as dealing with others is concerned. My natural state is basically happy, but completely disengaged. So as a person I tend to be neutral out in the real world.
And I did definitely notice when I was in my teens that I acted differently with different groups. And I had two distinctly, non-overlapping groups of friends in high school. I had the nerds, the honors math and science kids, with whom I had most of my classes. And I had another group that would best be described as nondescript. These are the kinds of people who could slip through high school almost completely unnoticed. Neither especially good looking nor hideous. Neither popular nor shunned. More athletic than average, but not at any kind of varsity level. Never causing trouble. Most of the time I spent with this group was during summers, when we'd play basketball most of the day after we worked in the daycamp.
And in middle school I hung out with almost everyone in small groups. And I remember at one point noticing that I talked like the people I was hanging out with, even though I don't normally talk like that or think like that. And it took me a while, but at one point I distinctly remember thinking that I could tell who my friends were because I like the way I acted when I was with that group. Considering I lack any sort of natural sense about personal relationships, this was a very important observation. And I've been lucky or smart enough to make a pretty good choices most of the way.
So in as wistless way possible, let me recount some thoughts and memories.
There's a lot of stuff I'll remember fondly from the strip. Some of them involve the group, like singing Shehechianu (and you can't begin to imagine what autocorrect did to that), and some of them are solitary, like my bike ride up to the top of the suspension bridge and my supine float from the bay back into the cove on a longboard.
I think one of these reasons that these memories feel so precious is that they involve doing something that I never in my life thought I would ever do. If you had told me 15 years ago that I would enjoy going to the beach and staying in a cheap hotel in with 60 teenagers and five other adults, all of whom I like to varying degrees, but none of whom are among my best friends, I have told you were nuts. But I really truly did enjoy myself. I liked being with the kids, even though I was in a semi supervisory role of all time, which is I guess what I always am when I'm with a group of kids.
It all seems paradoxical to me, my job. In many ways, I'm a loner. I don't mean that in the sense that I hate people or strongly prefer being by myself all the time, but I am perfectly comfortable being myself most indefinitely.
Another thing that's always fun is the chance to get some unstructured time with people I know from around school, but never have much of a chance to talk to. Last year, they were only three of us and it felt pretty close in a good way; this year there were six so it was a bit different. But it's still kind of analogous to the experiences the kids have- the chance to spend some nice unstructured time together. The chaperones walked the boardwalk as a group, we sat on the beach, we paddled. I feel really lucky to work in a place with so many people that I genuinely like.
One thing I'll remember fondly is a byproduct of my taking pictures. Although I knew most of the students on the trip, this wasn't a class that I knew especially well. Gathering people for pictures and getting their attention gave me a little bit of a window into the kinds of people who are graduating this year. For the most part, there isn't a lot of one-on-one interaction between the chaperones of the students, but I did get a chance to talk to a few people more than I normally have.
This was my 6th senior trip and it felt less awkward than some of the past ones. I really have no innate idea how to conduct myself in public, so to successfully negotiate hanging out with 60 people as a group for 3 days was very gratifying.
This was my 6th senior trip and it felt less awkward than some of the past ones. I really have no innate idea how to conduct myself in public, so to successfully negotiate hanging out with 60 people as a group for 3 days was very gratifying.
At one point, some of the kids were talking about how they weren't sure why they acted differently with different groups of people. This touched on one of the great realizations of my life, as far as dealing with others is concerned. My natural state is basically happy, but completely disengaged. So as a person I tend to be neutral out in the real world.
And I did definitely notice when I was in my teens that I acted differently with different groups. And I had two distinctly, non-overlapping groups of friends in high school. I had the nerds, the honors math and science kids, with whom I had most of my classes. And I had another group that would best be described as nondescript. These are the kinds of people who could slip through high school almost completely unnoticed. Neither especially good looking nor hideous. Neither popular nor shunned. More athletic than average, but not at any kind of varsity level. Never causing trouble. Most of the time I spent with this group was during summers, when we'd play basketball most of the day after we worked in the daycamp.
And in middle school I hung out with almost everyone in small groups. And I remember at one point noticing that I talked like the people I was hanging out with, even though I don't normally talk like that or think like that. And it took me a while, but at one point I distinctly remember thinking that I could tell who my friends were because I like the way I acted when I was with that group. Considering I lack any sort of natural sense about personal relationships, this was a very important observation. And I've been lucky or smart enough to make a pretty good choices most of the way.
And I have to say, in spite of the work aspect of it, which was really pretty tiring when I look back on it, I was able to relax a bit and just enjoy myself. Ocean City is a pretty pleasant place to stay. The hotel is cheap in every sense of the word, but it's right on the beach and convenient to all kinds of things, so why the hell not?
I was pleased with myself for remembering to bring my Nok-Hockey and shuffleboard games. Seemed like people enjoyed them. Hopefully I'll remember next time I do this. I was also very pleased that I brought my bike. I rode 20 and 25 miles the 2 days, and it was head-clearing and relaxing.
And of course I'll remember the Java Metallics, our van group. I know that most of them didn't really want to be there as opposed to the rest of the group on the bus, but we made the best of it. Fun trip.
I was pleased with myself for remembering to bring my Nok-Hockey and shuffleboard games. Seemed like people enjoyed them. Hopefully I'll remember next time I do this. I was also very pleased that I brought my bike. I rode 20 and 25 miles the 2 days, and it was head-clearing and relaxing.
And of course I'll remember the Java Metallics, our van group. I know that most of them didn't really want to be there as opposed to the rest of the group on the bus, but we made the best of it. Fun trip.
Tuesday, June 07, 2016
Senior Trip, Day 2
Today was long and (for a chaperone anyway) kind of grueling, but a whole lot of fun.
After my bike ride, we gathered up and headed over to a place where, after the ritual application of sunscreen, we rented longboards and kayaks and paddled around the bay for a couple of hours. It was perfect weather- warm with a light breeze, which thankfully was blowing back towards the dock. I stayed back at the dock to watch everyone's stuff for a while, but once I got out it was marvelous.
I paddled out to the edge of the main bay. It was good that I didn't have a kayak and more time because if I did, I'm sure I would have said, "sure, I can make it across that bay (about a mile and a half) and back in time." Which I couldn't have. So instead I laid down on my back and let the wind and current bring me back. I had to steer every once in a while, but no paddling at all. Incredibly relaxing.
Came back and had lunch. Vegetarian. I was okay with it (because it was food and I'm okay with food) but we noticed several people head out and return with Wawa bags presumably full of meat-filled hoagies. To each their own.
Then it was a free afternoon. Spent most of it on the beach. Talked with one of the other teachers for a pretty long time. There was a Wiffle ball game and a soccer ball being kicked around. A small but decent number braved the cold water to body surf. The waves were actually great but it was too cold for my taste. Some people sunbathed or read or just sat around and talked.
The one weird thing that happened was this guy came along and started posing a few of the girls and taking their pictures. I went down and figured that this was fine with them and that I'd take a few shots too as long as they were posed, but he insisted that I not take pictures, that only he was allowed to take pictures because he was licensed by the city. In retrospect, I should have asked to see his license, but I've never encountered anything like this before. I did hover, as did a couple of the guys, because the whole thing seemed sketchy. Eventually he left. I watched to see if he was taking pictures of anyone aside from teenage girls and it did seem that he was at least trying to.
Aside from that it was pretty uneventful. I came up to my room and showered and then it was time for dinner. I've really not had much free time, which isn't unusual, I'm working after all, but it made the day feel very long.
Then came dinner, which was not vegetarian (for everyone) and then we went to the boardwalk. Unlike past times we came here, the town is very busy. A lot of Maryland (and I assume other) high schools have their Senior Weeks here. Us chaperones went for a walk together and at one point everyone else went into an arcade to play skeeball. I love skeeball, but it was so nice out and so noisy in the arcade that I wouldn't go in.
I sat on a bench (with a memorial message on it) and watched people. On one hand, it was a more attractive than usual crowd. On the other, there was an very teenager-like sameness to it all. All the boys were in long, loose shorts, and all the girls in short tight ones. Those looks have been in for a while. I wonder when that'll change. The kids in the school dress like this too. The girls aren't supposed to; it's against something that's referred to as the dress code, but which doesn't seem to actually exist.
Eventually we got back to the hotel for a pool party, which I sat outside of. Too hot and humid and chloriney in there. That was okay. Then upstairs for an hour of shushing people and reminding the boys not to go into the girls' rooms and vice versa. And then at 12:30 a bed check and it was over. A long but good day.
After my bike ride, we gathered up and headed over to a place where, after the ritual application of sunscreen, we rented longboards and kayaks and paddled around the bay for a couple of hours. It was perfect weather- warm with a light breeze, which thankfully was blowing back towards the dock. I stayed back at the dock to watch everyone's stuff for a while, but once I got out it was marvelous.
I paddled out to the edge of the main bay. It was good that I didn't have a kayak and more time because if I did, I'm sure I would have said, "sure, I can make it across that bay (about a mile and a half) and back in time." Which I couldn't have. So instead I laid down on my back and let the wind and current bring me back. I had to steer every once in a while, but no paddling at all. Incredibly relaxing.
Came back and had lunch. Vegetarian. I was okay with it (because it was food and I'm okay with food) but we noticed several people head out and return with Wawa bags presumably full of meat-filled hoagies. To each their own.
Then it was a free afternoon. Spent most of it on the beach. Talked with one of the other teachers for a pretty long time. There was a Wiffle ball game and a soccer ball being kicked around. A small but decent number braved the cold water to body surf. The waves were actually great but it was too cold for my taste. Some people sunbathed or read or just sat around and talked.
Aside from that it was pretty uneventful. I came up to my room and showered and then it was time for dinner. I've really not had much free time, which isn't unusual, I'm working after all, but it made the day feel very long.
Then came dinner, which was not vegetarian (for everyone) and then we went to the boardwalk. Unlike past times we came here, the town is very busy. A lot of Maryland (and I assume other) high schools have their Senior Weeks here. Us chaperones went for a walk together and at one point everyone else went into an arcade to play skeeball. I love skeeball, but it was so nice out and so noisy in the arcade that I wouldn't go in.
I sat on a bench (with a memorial message on it) and watched people. On one hand, it was a more attractive than usual crowd. On the other, there was an very teenager-like sameness to it all. All the boys were in long, loose shorts, and all the girls in short tight ones. Those looks have been in for a while. I wonder when that'll change. The kids in the school dress like this too. The girls aren't supposed to; it's against something that's referred to as the dress code, but which doesn't seem to actually exist.
Eventually we got back to the hotel for a pool party, which I sat outside of. Too hot and humid and chloriney in there. That was okay. Then upstairs for an hour of shushing people and reminding the boys not to go into the girls' rooms and vice versa. And then at 12:30 a bed check and it was over. A long but good day.
Monday, June 06, 2016
What I do when I'm riding my bike.
Went for a nice 20 mile bike ride this morning, north to Bethany Beach. It's a beautiful day- perfect for riding. There are nice wide shoulders on both sides of the road, nice and smooth and not much junk sitting on them.
In one direction (when I spoke that into the phone it capitalized it), there's not only a shoulder, but a pedestrian path. Along the pedestrian path, there are lots of benches. I know people want to sit down sometimes when they're walking, but I don't know that you need one every 10 yards. People go on the paths to walk, not sit.
All the benches have some sort of message embossed into their backs. Some of them are ads for real estate companies, some praise Jesus or some other sort of deity. But most of them have some sort of memorial statement. "In loving memory of Person - Loving husband, father, and grandfather."
It got me thinking. That might be a nice way to memorialize myself after I'm gone. I have some money, so I could buy maybe 1000 benches and line all the area trails with them. Each one would say "In loving memory of Frank -" and then each one would be different.
No need for them to be true. Not all of those people could have been so great. I would give the trustees of my estate three lists of words- a superlative, a noun and a modifier. "Monumental appliance shredder" or "Unparalleled cabbage soother". Some would have to be alliterative. We'd have a special list for that. Hope I don't die too soon so I have time to work on this.
Senior trip 2016, day 1
I've always made a habit of blogging during senior trips. It's just something out of the ordinary.
Right now, I'm sitting in the atrium of the fabouloso Carousel Hotel in Ocean City, MD.
That's an ice skating rink in front of me. There's no actual carousel except a tiny one you put quarters into.
Right now, I'm sitting in the atrium of the fabouloso Carousel Hotel in Ocean City, MD.
That's an ice skating rink in front of me. There's no actual carousel except a tiny one you put quarters into.
This year we had too many kids to all fit In a bus. Someone had to drive a few in a van, and since unlike most of the people on the trip, I didn't want to do paintball, I got to do it.
In anticipation, I wrote this email to the students I was driving:
Hello fellow vanners,
We've got 2 1/2 hours to sit in the van on the way to Ocean City. Maybe all y'all can listen to music on headphones, but I can't while I'm driving, so I'm going to be playing music on the car stereo. It has one of those AUX plugs and I have a cable.
I'm putting together an Apple Music playlist for the ride. I've been buying and listening to lots of music since I was 10 (which was 1965), so I have plenty of things I like from all the way back then until now. I don't know if you'll love it but doubt you'll hate it. But I'd like to know a couple of things.
First, is there anything any of you would like me to add to the playlist? I'll tell you that my recent taste runs more alt than pop, so I might not know what current stuff you'll want to listen to. Just tell me songs and I'll add them in. I like pretty much anything from Kendrick Lamar to Zydeco to Gilbert and Sullivan, so don't worry about my going parental and turning it down.
Second, is there any artist or song you detest? My daughter has perfect pitch and can't listen to REM because the singer is always flat. And I have a friend who all but breaks into hives if Celine Dion comes on the radio. And no, I won't put any Celine Dion on the list unless we have Titanic fans on board. Anyway, someone will be sitting next to me and can hit the skip button if need be.
I got a couple of suggestions, but mostly put together the playlist with Ronnie. I ended up being a hundred something songs, and it was a an entertaining accompaniment to an easy ride down. I know I occasionally rag about the current state of pop music, but there has to be something to the fact that 18 year-olds know all the music I used to listen to. Old stuff like Sweet Caroline and I'm a Believer (also written by Neil Diamond) and less old stuff like Under Pressure. Because it's better than current pop music, plus nobody plays the really crappy older stuff- it's always the good stuff. In any event, it was fun to hear people singing along.
Once here, I spent several hours sitting in the atrium pictured above, because my room wasn't ready. I can't really complain about not being able to get in before regular check-in, because when I'm staying in a hotel I'm always asking to check out as late as possible.
We had lunch and eventually the other seniors showed up, so I spent part of the afternoon at the beach and pool until they shooed us off because of thunder. We got some rain, but it was more of a sound and light show than anything else.
I think I was conscious the remainder of the afternoon, but for the life of me I can't remember what I did. Maybe nothing; maybe that's why I don't remember. Eventually it was time for dinner, which was pretty decent (I didn't hear anyone complaining anyway) and because the weather was still very unsettled we couldn't go to the boardwalk. So instead some people watched the basketball game and some of us ice skated. I enjoyed skating, as I always do. I went round and round a bunch of times and also tried to help one girl who was able to stand up for the most part, but was unable to propel herself forward. I can't way that I was totally, or even partially successful, but it was fun anyway.
Eventually, the kids started to gather in the hallway, and a few of us chaperones walked across the street for frozen yogurt. That was nice. It's a very different feel from last year. There were only 30 kids instead of this years's 55 or so and only 3 chaperones instead of 6. Plus I'm not the lead chaperone this time; that part being played by a teacher who is far more organized and task-oriented than I am. This works out very well, because at all times of day I have very clear instructions on what I'm supposed to be doing and so I'm just doing it. I've done a bunch of these now and it's a lot easier to not be in charge.
I do like doing these trips. It's hard for me in a good way because it feeds right into my sense of social awkwardness. If I can spend 3 days interacting with people I'm ore than 3 times as old as, and with whom I share very limited common experience, aside from teaching some of them, then I'm successfully continuing to learn to act like human being, which is always my goal.
Tomorrow is a bike ride early, then paddleboarding and kayaking. Then beach. Sounds pretty decent to me.
Thursday, June 02, 2016
Why haven't I written anything?
It isn't like I no longer have anything to say. I talk to people every day and I think about things every day. And although I'm sure I go over old ground from time to time, it isn't like I've ceased to have original thoughts. I'm not sure what's missing. I haven't written anything for months and that's simply not like me.
Since I know it's good for me to keep writing, let 's start with what's on my mind. It's hot out. How about that? Profound, I know. Also, I'm going out to a movie and dinner and Ronnie is wearing a pair of nice sandals. What is the equivalent for me? Men's sandals inevitably look dorky. But so do running shoes at times, so maybe I should look into this.
But I won't really look into it, because then I'll end up buying some nice expensive sandals or something, when really I'd rather just wear sneakers or flip flops.
This is a conundrum for me in general, in part because of the difference in clothing choices between women and men and in part because of my semi-advanced age. Young men can get and regularly do away with wearing all kinds of stupid crap but if they're decent-looking and in reasonably good shape, they look fine. To take a simple example, it seems to me that guys regularly wear baseball caps backwards. There is no way that doesn't look dumb, especially if it's one of those adjustable caps with the plastic strip. Whenever I see that my estimation of the wearer's IQ drops by about 15%.
But older guys, even non-hideous, reasonably fit guys like me, can't get away with it. I mean, I guess we can with friends and family, but those are people who are going to love you no matter what, but with the public at large, forget it. I aspire to be a reasonably decent-looking old man, which sounds like a low bar to clear in the abstract, but is not so in practice. Old men can look distinguished dressed in a nice suit, but summer clothes are not that kind.
I'm probably too concerned about this. I look like myself, and that's okay.
Since I know it's good for me to keep writing, let 's start with what's on my mind. It's hot out. How about that? Profound, I know. Also, I'm going out to a movie and dinner and Ronnie is wearing a pair of nice sandals. What is the equivalent for me? Men's sandals inevitably look dorky. But so do running shoes at times, so maybe I should look into this.
But I won't really look into it, because then I'll end up buying some nice expensive sandals or something, when really I'd rather just wear sneakers or flip flops.
This is a conundrum for me in general, in part because of the difference in clothing choices between women and men and in part because of my semi-advanced age. Young men can get and regularly do away with wearing all kinds of stupid crap but if they're decent-looking and in reasonably good shape, they look fine. To take a simple example, it seems to me that guys regularly wear baseball caps backwards. There is no way that doesn't look dumb, especially if it's one of those adjustable caps with the plastic strip. Whenever I see that my estimation of the wearer's IQ drops by about 15%.
But older guys, even non-hideous, reasonably fit guys like me, can't get away with it. I mean, I guess we can with friends and family, but those are people who are going to love you no matter what, but with the public at large, forget it. I aspire to be a reasonably decent-looking old man, which sounds like a low bar to clear in the abstract, but is not so in practice. Old men can look distinguished dressed in a nice suit, but summer clothes are not that kind.
I'm probably too concerned about this. I look like myself, and that's okay.
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